Psalming It

Returning from a visit in Nashville, I popped the Life of David cd's into the player and consumed them on the way home (not all but the first few). So my life feels absolutely crazy right now...friends are getting married left and right, people are moving, things are exploding, and trying to figure out where I fit into the scheme of things after being gone for so long is too much to tackle. There is this inner frustration, like I'm either gonna burst into song or blow up my car, and what I hope comes out of me is Jesus. I'm having dreams warning me in one direction, I'm having spiritual guidance in others, I'm just trying to be a somewhat normal person, and all the while praying that in the midst of this confusing time I'm walking in God's will. SO yeah, I pop in the cd's and begin a mouth-watering journey into the life of a man I can identify with. Ever feel alone? Ever feel like you're the only one of your kind? It's nice when you do feel like that if your deepest connection and comfort can really come from God's heart. I love David's heart, and most of all I love the way God loves him. Because I can read it and feel it on such a personal level, those perceptions and feelings become my own. For example, Bickle was saying how David wrote one of the earlier Psalms because God had delivered David out of like a 16 month period of straight rebellion. But David doesn't say, "You delivered me because of Your great mercy," no he says, "You delivered me because You delight in me." That really touched me. So I've been using that lately. Like I'll say, "You're allowing me to go through this because You delight in me." Or, "You've promised me this because You delight in me." I also loved the part about David's core values...how he measured success. His primary indentity was as a lover of God and he knew God loved him. When Nathan said he'd be king, his focus wasn't on the position or glory or honor, it was the fact that God liked him. Bickle goes on to say that David's application process were the prayers and thoughts he had toward God during those hidden years. David was very faithful through the mundane. He cultivated his servant's attitude and when he became king still showed those same qualities. Anyway, there's so much in these sessions and I've only said a few things I'm trying to keep hidden in me for good. I'm sure I'll post more once we get into the battles and compromises.